Atlanta United vs. New York Red Bulls: How to pretend like you know what you're talking about for Matchday 3

Every soccer parent you've ever heard yelling "KICK IT" at any given opportunity is right actually

Same as every time, y’all. We’re going to give you the tools to sound like the smartest person in the room in whatever room you happen to be watching the game. Whether that’s in the stadium, in your house, or in a fight with someone on Al Gore’s internet, we’re going to try and get you prepared. So get your mind right. This is more about you than it is about me.

Well. I guess it’s time for another Red Bulls game. It’s a very silly joke that someone convinced us that one guy is Sisyphus when, actually, we’re all Sisyphus all the time.

The optimistic view here though is that Atlanta United is technically on a winning streak against these guys. It’s a winning streak of one, but that one ended up being pretty important in the overall scheme of things. Atlanta rode that win to a Decision Day miracle and the biggest playoff upset in MLS history, while Red Bulls bounced back and made their way to MLS Cup. Maybe both sides should just agree that another Atlanta United win is best for everybody.

Even if New York disagrees, a Five Stripes win doesn’t feel nearly as out of the realm of possibility as it used to. Atlanta is on a two-game home winning streak against the Red Bulls. Yeah, it’s their only two regular-season wins over New York in club history, but when you’re hot, you’re hot.

Alright, you’ve got the gist. Now, here are your talking points as Atlanta United looks for a third-straight home win against their least favorite team to play.

When someone listens to you talk about Atlanta looking for their third-straight home win and asks why Atlanta can suddenly beat these guys, you say: “Well,